Admiral Codrington

Sitting deep in a leather chair in my reciprocal club in London, I picked up the paper to discover that the once proud British navy was being cut in half, again. Since I only had one night to see my friends and wanted to support the Royal Navy in any way I could, I chose the “gastropub” Admiral Codrington, named after a British admiral known for his aggressive, gunboat diplomacy against Turkey, Greece, and Egypt.

With cats now outnumbering dogs as pets in England, some pubs have apparently decided to switch to cat-sized portions, and Admiral Codrington is leading the clowder. We started with the squid. This was no giant squid the Admiral had captured. It was two pops and you just can’t — keep going, because it’s all gone. Whitehall’s message had obviously reached the pub before we did, and the rib eye came out about half the size we were expecting. When we complained about the portion size, we were assured it was a full 6 oz (before preparation). Since about half my steak was fat, I calculated that the meat part cost more than its weight in silver. The unremarkable béarnaise sauce came in a tiny bowl, and the lettuce on the side was as tired as the night watch officer in a typhoon. To add insult to injury, the service charge was included and we were charged a pound each to cover butter and bread, which were never offered. We did not get a chance to try the dessert since we were told we had used up our time at the table and had to depart for the next party, but the Admiral did agree to remove the cover charge.

Since the Royal Navy has no more ships for the good Admiral to command, he apparently has left to join forces with Blackbeard, trading silver bullion for mediocre steak. Next time I visit London, I’ll settle for a nice steak and kidney pie.